It was Ladies Day at Ascot, and I wore my Ascot hat,
it went with the posh outfit I bought to hide all of my fat
I said I would never wear it again, it’s just too silly,
and I really feel stupid looking oh so very frilly.

But there I was again this year, wearing my dress of pink lace,
with some very big dark glasses, hoping they would hide my face,
and I wore the big frilly blue, pink and yellow hat again
and held my candy striped umbrella, just in case it might rain.
I took two hundred pounds with me, that was all that I would spend,
bet on an accumulator, that might pay off by the end.
Each race I bet on a favourite, and one I liked the name;
each race I won some small amount, so I really liked this game!

Then at the last race I decided to really splash it out,
put ev’rything I’d won on a rank outsider without doubt.
Thirty three to one, they said he wouldn’t stand a remote chance,
but I’d seen him in the paddock, and fell in love at first glance.
I placed my bet, and held my breath, but I couldn’t watch the race,
but I watched the expression on my frustrated husband’s face.
His horse was the firm favourite, and he was well in the lead,
but my horse was gaining on him quick – I really loved this steed!

Both horses reached the winning post, it was a photo finish,
so I held on to my hat again and made my final wish.
Then the exciting news was announced over the loud speaker
that my beloved horse had won. My knees were getting weaker.
I went to get my winnings, and they had paid for the whole day,
they’d covered the cost of my outfit, and all we’d had to pay.

The same has happened every time I wear my Ascot hat,
I had wondered why I’d kept it, but was very glad of that!
So the next time I get asked to go to the Ascot races
I’ll wear my silly frilly hat and scoff at people’s faces.
Because my hat has brought me good luck, of that I’m very sure,
and every time I have worn it, I have won even more!